How To Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting To Kill You

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449410499
Size: 10.48 MB
Format: PDF
View: 4010
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Jesus Rollerblading Christ--another helping of TheOatmeal! Mrow, MOAR kitty comics. Mr. Oats delivers a sidesplitting serving of cat humor in his new book, How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You. If your cat is kneading you, that's not a sign of affection. Your cat is actually checking your internal organs for weakness. If your cat brings you a dead animal, this isn't a gift. It's a warning. How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You is a hilarious, brilliant offering of comics, facts, and instructional guides about crazy cat behaviors from the creative wonderland at TheOatmeal.com. How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You presents fan favorites, such as "Cat vs. Internet," "How to Pet a Kitty," and "The Bobcats," plus 17 brand-new, never-before-seen cat-themed comic strips. This Oatmeal collection is a must-have for cat-lovers from Mr. Oats!

How To Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting To Kill You

Author: The Oatmeal Staff
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781449417055
Size: 66.13 MB
Format: PDF
View: 198
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The Oatmeal 2013 Wall Calendar • The Oatmeal is one of the most popular Web comics online, getting an average of 4.6 million unique visitorsand more than 20 million page views a month. • Time magazine named TheOatmeal.com one of the best blogs of 2010. Based on Matthew Inman's hugely popular Web site and hisNew York Timesbest-selling book5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth,How To Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting To Kill You 2013 Wall Calendarfeatures a quirky and humorous full-color comic each month along with a user-friendly grid. As a bonus, the calendar also includes a free, pull-out poster.

How To Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting To Kill You

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449410243
Size: 43.76 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
View: 7261
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Mr Oats delivers a side-splitting serving of cat comics in his new book, 'How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You'. If your cat is kneading you, that's not a sign of affection. Your cat is actually checking your internal organs for weakness. If your cat brings you a dead animal, this isn't a gift. It's a warning. 'How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You' is a hilarious, brilliant offering of cat comics, facts, and instructional guides from the creative wonderland at TheOatmeal.com.

My Dog The Paradox

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449437524
Size: 32.43 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
View: 6582
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The newest collection of the popular web comic, The Oatmeal.

5 Very Good Reasons To Punch A Dolphin In The Mouth And Other Useful Guides

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9781449406752
Size: 24.66 MB
Format: PDF
View: 447
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In Matthew Inman's New York Times best selling 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth (And Other Useful Guides), samurai sword-wielding kittens and hamsters that love .50-caliber machine guns commingle with a cracked out Tyrannosaur that is extremely hard to potty train. Bacon is better than true love and you may awake in the middle of the night to find your nephew nibbling on your toes. Inman creates these quirky scenes for theoatmeal.com, which launched in July 2009 and already has more than 82 million page views. In fact, every 15 to 30 seconds, someone Googles one of theoatmeal.com's creations. Now, 60 of Inman's comic illustrations and life-bending guides are presented in full-color inside 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth (And Other Useful Guides). Consider such handy advice as: 4 Reasons to Carry a Shovel at All Times, 6 Types of Crappy Hugs, 8 Ways to Tell if Your Loved One Plans to Eat You, 17 Things Worth Knowing About Your Cat, and 20 Things Worth Knowing About Beer.

404 Not Found

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781449480479
Size: 49.95 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
View: 3154
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Co-creator of the wildly popular Exploding Kittens card game and #1 New York Times best-selling author of How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You, The Oatmeal, aka Matthew Inman, presents an adult coloring adventure book filled with mantis shrimp, angler fish, bear-o-dactyls, space cats, and other fantastical creatures from the wonderland of The Oatmeal. Create your own Oatmeal masterpieces in 404 Not Found. In cozy Robot City, all robots are tucked in and accounted for, but #404 is missing. Is he searching for the city of Atlantis...or was he attacked by the shrimp known as mantis? Did he leave this worldly place...and find an evil race of cats from space? A fun, kid-friendly, safe-for-work coloring book, 404 Not Found is a magical story poem adventure to color and enjoy. A robot dot-to-dot and hidden objects throughout round out the fun! Relax and let your mind float as you color your way through enchanted lands with wondrous creatures from the brilliant mind of The Oatmeal.

How To Be Perfectly Unhappy

Author: The The Oatmeal
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781449433536
Size: 35.10 MB
Format: PDF
View: 6764
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Matthew Inman--Eisner Award-winning creator of The Oatmeal and #1 New York Times bestselling author of How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You--serves yet another helping of thoughtful hilarity in this charming, illustrated gift book for anyone who is irked by the question: "Are you happy?" In How To Be Perfectly Unhappy, Inman explores the surprising benefits of forgetting about "happiness," and embracing instead the meaningful activities that keep us busy and interested and fascinated.

The Terrible And Wonderful Reasons Why I Run Long Distances

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449461417
Size: 18.17 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
View: 285
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This is not just a book about running. It's a book about cupcakes. It's a book about suffering. It's a book about gluttony, vanity, bliss, electrical storms, ranch dressing, and Godzilla. It's a book about all the terrible and wonderful reasons we wake up each day and propel our bodies through rain, shine, heaven, and hell. From #1 New York Times best-selling author, Matthew Inman, AKA The Oatmeal, comes this hilarious, beautiful, poignant collection of comics and stories about running, eating, and one cartoonist's reasons for jogging across mountains until his toenails fall off. Containing over 70 pages of never-before-seen material, including "A Lazy Cartoonist's Guide to Becoming a Runner" and "The Blerch's Guide to Dieting," this book also comes with Blerch race stickers.

If My Dogs Were A Pair Of Middle Aged Men

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449488676
Size: 58.78 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
View: 3126
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In If My Dogs Were a Pair of Middle-Aged Men, Matthew Inman imagines, to hilarious effect, what life would be like if his dogs were a couple of old men running around his house. The result is a pitch-perfect gift for any dog owner.

How To Talk To Your Cat About Gun Safety

Author: Zachary Auburn
Publisher: Three Rivers Press
ISBN: 0451494938
Size: 57.42 MB
Format: PDF
View: 660
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The cats of America are under siege! Long gone are the good old days when a cat’s biggest worries were mean dogs or a bath. Modern cats must confront satanists, online predators, the possibility of needing to survive in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and countless other threats to their nine lives. For over four decades, the American Association of Patriots have stood at the vanguard of our country's defense by helping to prepare our nation's cat owners for the difficult conversations they dread having with their pets. Written in a simple Q&A format, How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety answers crucial questions such as, “What is the right age to talk to my cat about the proper use of firearms?” and “What are the benefits of my cat living a lifestyle of abstinence?” and especially “Why does my cat need to use the internet? Can’t he just play with yarn like cats used to do?” Our country—and our cats—stand at a precipice. It will take courage, and it will take hard work, but armed with the knowledge within these pages, we can make our cats—and America—great again!